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The chemistry of “multiple dating” in our society

I think I need to take some permission from chemists for using the word chemistry. I believe chemistry is all about reaction and there are reactions that involved in multiple dating. Lol

Personally I am of the opinion that people will always justify the reason for their actions maybe via their personal experience, what friends have told them or what they have watched on TV or heard on social media. I will like all my readers to flow with me as I will like to present some views about multiple dating.

The foundation of any relationship should be trust. Every other thing must find its root in trust. Relationship begins to experience threat whenever trust is absent. I am not going to bore you with trust because it is a topic that has been discussed by people times without number. So I believe you are familiar with discussion on trust. Let us try to move out from that premise.

 

There is nothing that affect us as a man as when we are insecured. Insecurity is a major problem that leads to multiple dating. Multiple dating is like a guess work on the part of anyone that engage in it and it is born out of insecurity or inordinate affection. Uh, don’t forget I talked about chemistry(reaction) earlier, that is one of the reactions that your body experience. You are not actually sure who is who, so you want to try as many ladies or guys out before you actually settle for the best out of them. Some guys even take pride in it, they use and change ladies like cloth while girls also retaliate this same act. Relationship has now been grossly abuse in the name of “multiple dating”, hurting people in the process.

I have also notice that it is easy to do to people what you cannot allow people to do to you.

Can you allow your emotion and psychological wellbeing to be trampled by someone?

This very act has made people to be insensitive to emotional and psychological problems they have caused to many of their partners as a result of these recklessness. This is an act of selfishness on the part of those that engage themselves in it. It potrays a guy or lady as someone without any sense of judgement or that lack clarity about life because every life is precious and you don’t treat people like a waste bin.

There is nothing as bad as when something is misunderstood or when we abuse the purpose of a thing, there has been many thing that should have bought joy that has been grossly abuse and it has turned to weapon of sorrow. For us to get things right we must put away any act of abuse that we might have engaged ourselves in. Most of these abuse stem from environmental influence, peer pressure and cultural background.

Few things that can be seen in people that engage in “multiple dating” are

1. They are insecure

2. They are sensual

3. They lacks ability to be committed

4. They are not reliable

5. They are insensitive

6. They may sometimes lack precision and accuracy.

7. They are emotionally unstable

8. They lack required skill to cultuvate or nurture a relationship

It is very important that we put away whatsover reason why you engage in such act; for some it maybe to have peer recognition, while some claim it is as a result of past hurt and others maybe due to insecurity. I believe before you go into any relationship you must not be driven by emotion but by “engaging every other instrument” at your disposal in getting it right When you know you are not ripe for it, just do away with it instead of getting yourself into emotional trauma or imbalance.

I have always been of an opinion relationship is not a tool to destroy but an instrument for mutual growth. It is not to kill but to heal. I believe relationship is to groom, build, nurture and add positive values to you. Do not engage yourself in abusive relationship, it will cost you alot.

Your true self is still hidden if you are still engaging in this act.

Discover yourself!

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About Bolarinwa Olajire

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